I think there is something wrong with me. Seriously. I mean, it’s always been a little more prevalent in me than others but lately it seems to be getting worse. Definitely over the last couple of weeks it’s getting worse. The most embarrassing part is that it’s happening more and more out in public. In my car, when I’m walking around the mall with my daughter. Everywhere.
I cry a lot.
I’ve always been the kind of person who tears up at pretty much anything emotional related. Sappy commercial? You bet. Books? Of course. Retelling something sad I saw/heard/did to someone? Yes.
When my 15 year old daughter came home for the first time after spending her summer in Ontario, I ugly cried at the airport in her arms when she came in from the plane. I feel bad for my 20 year old son when I pick him up in a few weeks. I’m going to cry all over him, poor bugger.
It’s almost becoming a bit of a running gag, this crying. I will be in the car, on the way to drop my daughter off at work and either a song will come on or we will be talking about something and I’ll get that lump in my throat, my face will go hot and tears will well up. I point to my eyes and make a Tim Allen-esque grunting noise and she rolls her eyes and laughs. “Again?”
I love music with some pretty serious intensity and lately I’ve been fixating on Miss Saigon because I finally replaced my soundtrack. DAMN if that musical doesn’t rip me to pieces every time, especially Act 2, and yet the music is so beguiling to me that I keep on listening. And crying.
Maybe this is some big secret they don’t tell you about 38. And I can’t figure out why I’m still peeing so much since all my bodily fluids keep insisting on coming out through my eyes. Or I’m possessed by tiny little ghosts who are sitting in my head and keep hitting the flush button and giggling. I don’t know. It can be embarrassing. Not as embarrassing as the other little ‘fun’ nuance I have where if I laugh too hard I end up literally coughing so loud that it sounds like honking, but embarrassing nonetheless.
There. I just yawned and already my eyes are wet.
I guess I’m going to have to spend a day searching for my sensitivity valve and turn it down a couple of notches. Pretty sure mine is currently set at Tammy Faye Baker. Thank god I don’t wear a lot of mascara. I don’t know how to access the switch, but I believe it has something to do with watching lots of silly movies with my kids all day, in sweat pants and a robe, eating cookies and poking fun at our ridiculous dogs. Tonight the hubby and I have tickets to go and see Ron James perform, which of course is going to get us laughing like crazy. Which, you know, if I do too much of will either make me do that seal-bark cough thing, or it will make me pee, or cry.
Maybe all three.
Hopefully not all at once.