It happened this weekend.
I’ve been slowly doing a purge of the house. You know, going into boxes, drawers, closets, on the backs of shelves that I haven’t touched in so long I’d forgotten what they contained and getting rid of anything and everything that is no longer needed or used.
It’s interesting, I had no idea what a pack-rat I am. But, one room at a time, my place is starting to look quite lovely. Dare I say even organised.
This weekend it was the dining room, which, up until this weekend, had been the ‘little living room’. We have two rooms that are side by side that we keep switching up as living area/dining area and this room was about to make the switch again. So, up until this weekend it contained an old couch and chair that were constantly covered with laundry, coats, a basket of never sorted socks, and miscellaneous stuff from the house. It also had two book shelves piled full of books.
I knew that in order to move big things like furniture around, I’d have to get rid of the smaller pieces of furniture first, which meant the book shelves would have to come out. Which meant, they’d have to be emptied.
Now, I will preface the rest of this story by telling you a few things:
1. When I was a newly wed, before I moved out the first time (and slightly subsequently through the next five years) I ransacked my parent’s bookshelves at home for all the books I had loved as a kid and packed them with my stuff to move out with me.
2. There are about 10 book shelves in my house and each and every one of them is not only full, but bursting with books. That’s not really related to the story, per se, it’s just a really cool fun fact.
3. Some of those books are now falling apart and now that my kids are all teenagers except for the youngest (who is 11) no one really ever reads those old books anymore. They’ve probably forgotten we even had them.
Anyway, there I was, sitting on the floor of the little living room – soon to be new dining room, pulling books off the shelves and making piles. One for keep, one for donate, and one to give to my sister for her little daughter, nearly a year old already.
Now, my kids are greatly skilled at avoiding me when I’m doing anything that looks like work. Oh sure, they would talk to me every so often, enough so that I wouldn’t start to seek them out I’m sure, but they were not interested in getting involved in a job that looked tedious, dirty and time consuming.
Until.
I pulled one of the books off the shelve and made a sound. Apparently it was kind of like a sad, exclamatory type of “oh”. This got their attention. I came into the main living room where they were very seriously busy at playing on the wii (apparently, they were bonding and this is important because I always lecture them on getting along) and showed them the book in my hands.
Yummy, yummy, GULP.
It’s a pop-up book about animals eating one another, which sounds actually kind of morbid when I type it out, but it’s sort of an homage to ‘the old lady who swallowed a fly’ and they had loved it as kids.
Game controllers flung aside, they realized what I was doing and all of a sudden, I was the most interesting person in the room.
Jillian Jiggs, Berenstain Bears, Robert Munsch, The Boy with the Drum, The Queen who Stole the Sky, Where the Wild Things Are, Sleeping Dragons all Around. They came off the shelves and kids exclaimed and re-read and got excited. It was kind of awesome to see, actually. They argued with me that I should never get rid of them, but, I reasoned, until today, those books had barely been touched since we first moved to our house five years ago. And, wouldn’t it be nice for them to let their cousin have some of the same literary experiences that they had and obviously remembered so fondly?
They agreed, but with slightly sad faces. My oldest daughter, looking down at a box destined for my sister said with a frown, ‘my whole childhood is in that box’.
It wasn’t only the kids who had a moment looking at all the memories bound into colourful pages that day. I could almost feel the weight of their very much younger selves curled up on my lap, hair smelling of shampoo, pajamas mix-matched and soft from the dryer. I could actually picture their faces, 5, 10, even 15 years ago as they pulled their favourites down from the shelves and begged me to read it just one more time, mommy.
I don’t feel bad, giving them away though. I’m sure my other two sisters will have a few words about why now, and why not to them…and I don’t really have an answer. Maybe it’s just because it’s time. Maybe it’s because the sister they are going to is the one who just had her first baby and my other two sisters have more than one child and already have their own little libraries built up. I have no doubt some sisterly book sharing will occur. I also have no doubt that some day when my kids are starting families of their own, they will scour book stores for the favourites they remember, search every used book sale, call their Aunt over and over requesting a return of the volumes they loved so that they can in turn, share them with their own kids. Just as I did.
It’s hard, when you know, not just think fleetingly, that certain parts of your parenting job are over, that your kids have reached certain milestones. I know my job is not finished, nor will it ever really be, but they don’t need me the way they once did. It’s a little bit sad. I guess for me, part of their childhood is in that box too.
But it’s okay. I’m so proud of my kids. For the tiny little mischievous imps they were, for the beautiful people they are turning out to be. I look at them now, teenagers mostly, one of them almost 20 and ready to go out and be on his own and I think, I helped create that person. From late night bedtime stories to late night laughs over a beer. I’m a part of their story now just as they are part of mine.
I love reading your posts, Nuala
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Thanks Aunt Jean!
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Great Post Nu,
ummmm…. we have TONS of books too. Some from the ‘rents and most from other sources…. ummmm…. I’d just like to say that ‘The Queen Who Stole The Sky’ is clearly my book from when I was a kid and I’d love it mailed to me. 😀 Oh please, please mail it to me. My kids would LOVE it. Thank you kindly. me
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I knew you’d say that about that book!! Actually, Keisha special ordered me a copy for my birthday about two years ago because I really wanted it. So the one I have is mine (wicked laugh). What happened to yours? I thought you had that and Tatterhood (which she tried to find me but couldn’t)
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Ya, Niamh. Don’t go stealing that book from her! Lol, I spent months looking for that and Tatterhood, specifically for her birthday.
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Sooo That’s where all those book went to!
If you find ‘The Violin Makers Gift” I’d love to have that one again.
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Never heard of ‘The Violin Makers Gift,’ but yes, I do have Tatterhood as it was always mine. Soooo maybe I’ll have to hunt for The Queen Who Stole The sky’….
bugger.
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I miss Tatterhood. I think it was the beautiful illustrations in your copy. What a stunning book. Even if the story is slightly creepy (as all the best children’s stories are…)
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